Monday, March 31, 2008
cube is square
There I sat day by day..
wasting daylight... wasting away.
I was missing the sun, and she missed me.
What was I to do??
To be under a tree.
Fluorescent lights, torturous things.
Computer whirling, phones a ring..
I had a headache.. My body cried.
They said I wasn't doing good enough..
I really did try..
So I quit my job the other day...
Money is just money, anyway..
Being happy is worth more than gold.
Never take a job sitting in a cubicle.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Thursday, March 06, 2008
Evolve to not return
He is the kind of person who says "I wish you wouldn't have come over" when it doesn't go his way. The king peacock. He is just so predictable. I resist being his again. I say, it is not personal. I just cannot do that yet. I am not ready for it. It's the first insult. But, it is not a personal attack. It is just me. I speak the truth. Yes, I do enjoy his company. I miss him. My hopes are high. It would be nice if... But, yet, I hurt his pride still. Please hear me!!
I fall on deaf ears.
For, I am, the selfish one. I wish this, I wish that. You said... blah blah blah. He says to me as I put on my shoes to leave, avoiding this conflict. "I wish you would not have come over the other night at all", that's a lie... Oh God, I am back here again!
Not this time.
I will not have venom spewed at me from a 33year old child pitching a fit because he cannot get his way. I am leaving. I realize, it may always be this way. I cannot fathom that thought, I get nauseated.
It is true.. people do not change, they cannot. Especially men. Humans are who they are. We may learn to process information differently.. We may not. We have the possibility to evolve. Perhaps, some people, do not? I like to think, he could change his way of thinking.. How he is so offended with every reason possible? Is he so scared?
I use to be so scared. But you learn to let go. Live in this beautiful present perfect moment... Even if it's a fight, and arguement, or huge tear I swore.. Never again I would shed. But I did. Obviously, I am not changing either.
May be I should evolve past him. But I do not care to. I want him in my life. I am not that easy though. I guess, no one is.
I am emotionally on a platter here. Gobbled up and shoved away all at the same time.
I fall on deaf ears.
For, I am, the selfish one. I wish this, I wish that. You said... blah blah blah. He says to me as I put on my shoes to leave, avoiding this conflict. "I wish you would not have come over the other night at all", that's a lie... Oh God, I am back here again!
Not this time.
I will not have venom spewed at me from a 33year old child pitching a fit because he cannot get his way. I am leaving. I realize, it may always be this way. I cannot fathom that thought, I get nauseated.
It is true.. people do not change, they cannot. Especially men. Humans are who they are. We may learn to process information differently.. We may not. We have the possibility to evolve. Perhaps, some people, do not? I like to think, he could change his way of thinking.. How he is so offended with every reason possible? Is he so scared?
I use to be so scared. But you learn to let go. Live in this beautiful present perfect moment... Even if it's a fight, and arguement, or huge tear I swore.. Never again I would shed. But I did. Obviously, I am not changing either.
May be I should evolve past him. But I do not care to. I want him in my life. I am not that easy though. I guess, no one is.
I am emotionally on a platter here. Gobbled up and shoved away all at the same time.
It is really, truly devastating.
I am in sorrow in this present beautiful perfect moment. Sorrow is evolution. (?)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
