MARTYr

Jaded,

aloof,

and unsure..

I've learned deeply these things.

A part of me lies within, 

emptied. 

Desolate, however not lonely.

Dual existence

and soft touch

I do not desire in my heart.

I've had enough lovers to last my lifetime...

I have no craving for romantic love.

I am not curious for someone new,

I do not want to taste or passion or hot hot heat.

I wonder..

    if there isn't an illness within me..

If all joy in love has been taken from me

I feel I should desire a lover and a partner.

All is gone from within me. 

and my cup lies empty and dry. 

I am tired

bored

unmotivated 

distrusting

exausted

and content

I have nothing left of which to feel feelings

I have nothing left to exchange spark

I have nothing left to give 

I should care

But I cannot honestly say that I do.. 

The truth falls heavy on my heart.

Can I call this a lesson learned?

I am 

simply

used.

Like a old book at a thrift store. 

I am useless to most.

I cannot honestly say that I am worried.

You cannot miss what you do not have

or desire.

I am needless

Formless 

Shapeless.

I am hollow. 

I am living alone...

Within the cave of myself.

I am my own dwelling.

I need nothing

I need no one.

I breathe a dull sigh..

But I am still, 

So extreamly jaded.

    MARTYr

I was 

I have had too much taken from me,

 from you. 

I gave so freely 

and now,

now,

I am now empty.

I am resentful and numb.